The Pain Gain

Hey Beautifuls! 

All the jetsetting and working on my feet in this warm weather has caught up with me and I’ve been suffering with extra aches and pains recently due to this. It got me contemplating on the subject of pain and why we feel guilty. 

Pain is still a taboo subject. If you’re in labour, it’s fine to admit you’re in pain. Same goes for wisdom teeth coming through…. knocking your toe on a coffee table… stepping on lego… All of these are ok reasons to say you are in pain. If you are disabled, however, your disability should be suffered in silence… is this for you to feel better or for others to feel better about not having to deal with you and your awkward pain? Because, if you don’t mention it then it happily doesn’t exist! 

My leg has a constant hangover. It’s sluggish. It’s chubby and squeezed into all sorts of garments all day. Imagine wearing a swimming cap all day the next time you have a headache from drinking too many cocktails! Welcome to our life! I have a disability…so of course I suffer pain. 

So why do I dislike drawing attention to it!? 

  • I’m pretty much always at a 2.5 on a scale to 10. This means I’ve internally normalised my pain, therefore feeling I have no right to say I’m in pain because I’m now accustomed to it! 
  • The aches grow throughout the day. I don’t take painkillers, thus it’ll obviously grow worse! 
  • It’s self inflicted… if I’ve had a manic day running from one part of the school to another, then to the gym in the night… it’s surely my fault! 
  • I wear heels. People would assume my legs and feet ache from heels. I find walking in heels less painful as my ankle doesn’t fold over on itself. People would assume I feel the same ache and pain as girls who wear heels on a night out and need to remove them to walk into the kebab shop. Wrong. Entirely different aches. 
  • I choose to go to a gym. Surely that can’t help…. 

The pain I suffer grows worse depending on many variables. It could be from walking around in hotter weather. It could be from going on a night out. It hinders aspects of life you’d never think of! I’m planning my Mexico holiday itinerary around the likelihood of pain. For example chichen itza can’t be done the day of or day before coco bongos, just as coco bongo will be a no go the day before chichen itza (no, not just because I’ll be hungover!). The reason I do this is not ruin mine or my other half’s holiday. 

If you follow my Pinterest, you’ll spot I’m a believer of spoon theory. It takes so many spoons to do activities such as washing, going to work, doing the ironing. Heck I even cook like a flamingo (stood on one leg) to not create more pain for myself and to use one less spoon!! 

But still, no matter what I face I’ll plaster on a fake smile (unless around immediate family) and get on with it. I no longer see the point in complaining and holding a pity party everyday! 

How do you deal with the aches and pains of being a Lymphie? I’d love to know. Please put your answers in the comments section!! 

Lots of Love

L xoxox

Copyright Lauren Toner 2011-2017

2 thoughts on “The Pain Gain

  1. This was great to read, thank you! I have followed you on Instagram for a few months, but have really only recently begun reading your blog. I have suffered an increase in my lymphedema over the last few weeks and have been having some issues dealing with the pain and explaining it to others, mostly out of fear of their perception of me.
    I wear heels more than not, everyone thinks I’m crazy. It’s so good to see someone else sharing the same thought process!
    I find running helps with the pain too, it holds ot off a little longer anyways. And during the summer I almost always end my days with cold showers or putting my feet in an ice bath to deal with some of the pain before bed.
    Good luck! I look forward to reading more of your blog 😊


    • Thank you so much for your positive feedback. I really love when I get to interact with some of you who this! I always get crazy looks for heels, but you do what suits you!! I’m not crazy enough to run. I used to love it as a child, but now I’m older, if I run there’s probably something chasing me! Lol. I think it’s quite apt as the summer always picks up on the pain levels!
      Stay safe in this heat. Xxx


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